Amusing Article By Joy
Henderson
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This is a test to determine if people are truly ready for a dog. They will be stressed to every limit, with little mercy shown. If the Potential Puppy Owner passes, they will be given a license to start learning about the breed of their choice. Hereinafter the Potential Puppy Owner will be referred as PPO. Under no circumstances will physical force,
yelling, cursing, or
Protective padding, or soil proof clothes
of any sort are NOT
Small wounds and scratches will be
handled in a blase manner. Washing
Tests will be held in a variety of
environments. From crowded
PPO will only have one set of clothes
permitted. If at any time, they
Test. PPO must control a highly stimulated 10 month
old male German Shepherd
PPO must stand in between a 14 month old
Golden Retriever puppy and a
PPO must serve dinner to six Rottweiler
puppies. The puppies will be
PPO must quiet either four Shetland Sheepdogs,
or six Pomeranians when
PPO must hold their ground with 10 Jack Russell
Terriers chasing a
PPO Must hold their ground with 2 Great Danes
on ice. They may not
PPO Must play with a male Newfoundland after
the dog has been swimming
PPO Must leave two huskies alone with their
home for 3 hours uncrated.
PPO Must groom an adult male Collie blowing
coat completely within 25
PPO must be introduced into a pack of Beagles
ready for a hunt,
PPO must fit a Basenji into a weather protective
coat within 5
PPO must carry an Irish Wolfhound puppy up
and down the stairs for 20 times
PPO must remove the thistles out of the coat
of a English Setter.
PPO must exercise a Vizsla who has not received
exercise for 2 days.
PPO must sleep in the room with a Bulldog.
If PPO does not get any
PPO must clean the yard of a St. Bernard
breeder within 10 minutes in
PPO must sit in the same room and read an
entire magazine while a Shiba Inu
PPO will strip a Giant Schnauzer under the
supervision of the breeder,
PPO will take a large breed to the vets after being neutered. PPO will navigate through 10 small dogs without stepping on one. PPO must pass an agility course. PPO must secure a steady supply of used bag
within 3 days. Stealing bags
PPO must be able to successfully get a dog
to throw up in a bag while
PPO must not die of shock when they have
to cough up the veterinary
PPO must not die of shock at the food bill
of two growing
PPO must sit in a closed room for 12
hours with at least two dogs that
PPO must live with two 5 month old active
breed puppies and not go
PPO must spend 72 hours with the breeder
whelping and watching puppies
PPO must spend the night on the floor beside's
a sick dog's bed, just to be
PPO will go on a camping trip and take the
dog everywhere with them,
PPO must vow to love, train, care and
nurture their dogs for the rest
Furthermore the PPO must manage to keep good
humored and remember that for
PPO must try to be the person their dog thinks they are. Copyright Joy Henderson 1999. All rights
reserved.
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